Chicago Part II

The day after the wedding was beautiful. Uncle Steve came up on his motorcycle and wore his helmet, which Eban said was very good. We went to the park where Eban got in a tad bit of trouble as we heard some loud kid chatter and then Eban screaming BE NICE TO ME! I had to run up into this three-story structure all scrunched over to see what the fuss was about and on my way up, I passed a four or five year old boy crying saying that a boy punched him. Eban was calmly walking behind him and I exclaimed and pointed to him, “THAT BOY?” The crying kid said yes. I immediately told Eban to say sorry. So he grumbled off a little I’m sorry when a camp counselor came into the structure and said she would handle it. She took the crying kid and I took my kid. So I got down on his level and looked at Eban and asked him why he punched him. Eban said that the boys weren’t being nice to him and wouldn’t let him play. He asked to play again and the boys wouldn’t let him pass or get on the slide. Some words were exchanged and it got more heated and Eban started screaming BE NICE TO ME and Eban lost it and punched the little boy. Now, I don’t know how hard but I know the boy wasn’t injured…just very rattled.

So I had to have a conversation about using your words when things like that happen, not fists or violence.

Then he had a meltdown in the Deerfield Library in the kid’s section. A little boy came in and wanted to play with the trains so I told Eban to give the cute boy half of his trains. This little lesson in sharing didn’t go as planned and he erupted in fits of tears and screaming. So I pulled him over to a corner in the kid’s section to have a little talk and while we were heading there, he kicked off his shoes. So as I was on his level talking about sharing, a door opened abruptly right behind me. There stood a little librarian glaring at me as she curtly said, “Can’t you see these are administrative offices?” I bubbled out an “I guess so.” Then she looked over Eban head to toe (not once but twice with her beady eyes) and glared back up at me and said, “That boy needs shoes on. It’s library policy.” I told her okay as I was then focusing on her behavior and not my son’s. Then she decided to add nonchalantly, “Is he okay?” in the most uncaring or uncompassionate way. This irked me. I told her he was fine as curt as she was (maybe just as snide as she was). So I put Eban in a great football hold, picked up his shoes and loudly asked, “Why would they have the administrative offices in the children’s section as this is bound to happen?!” So I know I didn’t react in the most positive way. I was just not impressed whatsoever by the way this woman handled it and I sunk to her level and let her behavior be infectious. Please tell me this has happened to others who read this as they were trying to make an important lesson into their kid’s life and then they botched the lesson due to distractions??! Mind you, I’m a huge advocate and supporter of literacy projects and libraries, but it will take me awhile before I ever set foot into the Deerfield Public Library again. It’s too bad. Like I say, it’s not the situation that matters; it’s your reaction to the situation. Ugh, I know better.

Then a highlight of the day was swimming. Eban loved swimming at Tutu’s clubhouse pool with Uncle Steve. He threw him so high and Eban kept saying MORE MORE MORE.

Eban was also allowed to sit on Uncle Steve’s motorcycle and you could tell how cool he thought he was. Funny stuff! As Uncle Steve left that night, Eban sassily put his hand on his hip and told him to, “Be careful. Be careful on your motorcycle and watch out for tornados.” I guess Eban didn’t forget about the numerous tornados we had in June when he was talking to Uncle Steve.

The last morning of our visit was unplanned and all Eban wanted to do was go down to Uncle Steve’s. So off we went and his favorite place was the floor of his garage playing with trains. He couldn’t have been dirtier or happier. We had Chicago style pizza and during lunch we were laughing at Eban’s response which we all couldn’t remember earlier in the day as he was mad about the fact that we moved his “awesome shoes” (a.k.a. Nerf Flip Flops). He piped up with a mouth full of pizza and said, “I SAID, ‘What have you DONE?’” I was so impressed that he could remember exactly what he had said earlier in the day…he’s growing up!

Off we went to the airport and we sat down at Chili’s to have dinner. Of course I had their chips and salsa and got Eban mac and cheese. I wanted something healthy so I got a Caesar salad - - not that healthy, but it’s still a salad. Well, Eban LOVED it. He said it was his favorite dish on the table. To test him, I gave him Caesar salad when we got home and he ate the whole thing there too. So I guess my three-year old has a unique palate!

An act of random kindness occurred at the airport. It was like a double-edged sword though. In the airport gift shop, I was buying water and snacks for our flight when Eban decided he wanted a big United plane toy. Of course, it’s only $30.00, but still, I thought he didn’t need it. So I flatly told him no. Talk about an epic meltdown in public…ugh! So he pulls a ginormous tantrum in the middle of the hallway at O’Hare. People were walking by and he was flat on the floor throwing his fists on the ground because he was mad about the fact that I wouldn’t get him a plane. Some people smiled knowingly at me - - others got wide-eyed as they looked from this little demon to me. So after two minutes of agony, I picked him up and brought him into the girl’s bathroom and all the stalls were taken. So I went into a corner and he is still bawling and screaming at me. I am calmly telling him no, no and that he can’t get everything he wants…when suddenly, a plane appears in front of my eyes. I look behind me and it’s a kindly woman holding the middle-sized plane toy from the shop. She said, “Here you go, honey.” I looked at her and then looked at him and he flatly said, “This isn’t the big plane toy.”

Ugh: A – I wanted to wallop him for being an ungrateful little boy. B – I wanted to thank her and hug her for doing an act of kindness and C – Her act of kindness was destroying any type of lesson I was trying to teach him on limits and getting what you want.

Then to top it off, as I was walking away to our terminal gate, a woman came up to me out of the blue and got in my face and told me to be glad that I have a screaming toddler as that means he’s normal. I shook my head in agreement wondering where this was coming from and she continued by saying her toddler has cancer and can’t scream and told me that I should embrace these moments. Interesting day to say the least –

Swimming with Uncle Steve

Chicago Visit with Eban (Sara's Wedding)

Eban and I took another trip to attend a wedding together. This time it was to Chicago so I was able to see my hometown and to reconnect with old friends and most importantly, family. We got in around midnight and Tutu kindly came and retrieved us from construction-crazed O’Hare airport.

The next morning, Uncle Steve came up from Chicago so we could have a morning excursion on the double-decker train to Round Lake. I think that’s where we went? Anyway, we had to stop and get Starbucks for everyone - - including Eban. Then we had the pleasure of watching a big, train come to the station on the other side of the tracks. The nice people waved to Eban and he could barely stand it. He wanted to get on the choo-choo train! Thank goodness the train finally arrived and off we went. Of course, we had to sit on the top floor and Eban would only sit with Uncle Steve.

The conductor came and took our tickets and Eban was enthralled. He stared out the window with delight.

Once we arrived in Round Lake, we ate at a tiny little restaurant with a train theme and Eban was bonkers about it. So much so that he could barely contain his excitement. As we finished our meal and headed back to the train station, there was a train waiting in one of the adjacent tracks. Eban cried and cried when he saw it as all he wanted to do was get on it. Our train arrived shortly so we didn’t have to hear him meltdown about trains any longer! And trust me when I say the boy has some lungs…he can be quite loud!

By the time we got home, the boys crashed.

Then we headed off to Sara’s informal BBQ rehearsal dinner at a park in Evanston. It was perfect. There was food, drinks and a playground. It was wonderful to see Chub and Linda and meet Chris’ family and friends. Uncle Steve had to enact the same fireman scenario at the park’s various play structures roughly eight times…Eban was saving animals that were in burning buildings. Great imagination! The highlight was when one of Chris’ friends brought his WWE wrestling belt which Tutu thought was real so she put it on. That was certainly a scene-stealing moment which caused everyone to erupt in laughter as it’s so out of the norm for her to do something like this.

Sunday morning we made homemade biscuits before traipsing over to the old neighborhood. It was like old times. Dick and Ali had a dog they were yelling at. They had their fridge filled with cokes so I happily stole one! Eban ran over to the neighbor’s house to play in their homemade tree fort which was incredible. My only complaint was this visit was too short as we reminisced and laughed about all the old neighbors and what trouble we got into and out of!

Finally, we drove downtown to the wedding. First of all, I can’t believe they changed the names of the Sear’s Tower. I can’t remember the new name of it?? The wedding was at the Methodist Church across the street from the Picasso Art structure near Daley Plaza. It was beautiful and Eban couldn’t have been more hyper and excited to run around. Did I mention he was the only kid at the wedding?? So the fact that he was loud was exasperated by the fact that he was the ONLY loud one. As he was kicking a pew or something and I was scrambling to get him to keep quiet, I shoved a trusty ring pop into his mouth. This didn’t work as he was still hyper. As my energizer bunny of a child continue to make a mini-fit of happy noise, a man sitting in front of us turned around and held his arms out to Eban. Eban then held his arms out to this man and I handed Eban over the pew to this guy. Whoever he was, I didn’t care. He took Eban and I kept my fingers crossed that Eban would sit still long enough for me to get a two minute breather. As I collected myself from having “that kid” I noticed that Eban couldn’t have been happier and content.

He sat on this man’s lap for the rest of the ceremony. He even went up and got communion with him and was a good as he could be. I guess he likes pushing my buttons, but when he’s with others, he’s as good as gold. Tutu and I were incredulous. Yet we also loved this stranger for taking Eban so everyone could enjoy the ceremony!

The reception was a hoot! It was at the Greek restaurant called The Parthenon. Eban was nuts and ran all around. The only time he calmed down was when the belly dancer came out and started tearing up a rug. He was simply captivated and everyone was in hysterics watching him stare in amazement with her. He loved the flaming cheese and ate two servings of that. He didn’t dance much but was singing some song on the way home about “Taking it to the Higher Power” - - whatever that song it but he sang it? All my pictures came out a tad blurry from this evening so I think I had a dirty lens, so I'm rather bummed about it. The only one that came out was the one of Eban clearly staring at the belly dancer. Nice.

Speaking of singing, he also likes Bob Marley’s Three Little Birds. Jack gets some of it right, but it’s really cute to hear them both sing (on key) that, “Every little thing - - Is gonna be alright!”

Waiting for the train in Deerfield, IL


Playing on Picasso